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This is where most jokes live.\n//\n// Split from complaint.js because Val Town caps one file at 80,000 characters\n// and the combined file was 88,000. On Val Town this is a second file in the\n// same val named exactly topics.js — complaint.http.ts imports \"./topics.js\".\n//\n// Each topic needs: aliases (unique across ALL topics), noun (short singular\n// label used by combos/modifiers), lines. Keep lines under ~300 chars.\n// Use {by} for the asker's Twitch name. Both rules are enforced by tests.\n\n// Interchangeable vocabularies. Any line in any pool may use {slot}; every\n// occurrence of the SAME name in one line gets the SAME value, so the sentence\n// stays coherent. For a second, different value use a number: {eco} and {eco2}.\n//\n// \"F1re's {eco} is 14 tiles away. His opponent's {eco} is in their base.\"\n// \"Out of {eco}, out of {eco2}, out of ideas, in that order.\"\n//\n// RULE: every value in a list must be grammatically interchangeable — same\n// number, same article behaviour. \"berries\" cannot sit in `eco` beside \"gold\",\n// because \"F1re's berries IS 14 tiles away\" is broken. That is why there are\n// separate singular and plural unit lists.\n//\n// Only use a slot where the noun is INCIDENTAL to the joke. \"The camel counters\n// cavalry\" must keep its camel — the camel is the punchline.\nexport const SLOTS = {\n // A LOCATION on the map — \"F1re's {eco} is 14 tiles away\". Includes features\n // you gather from, so it must not be used for quantities: \"out of woodline\"\n // and \"3000 berry bush\" are both broken.\n eco: [\"gold\", \"stone\", \"wood\", \"food\", \"woodline\", \"berry bush\"],\n // A QUANTITY you consume — \"out of {res}\", \"3000 {res}\". Mass nouns only,\n // which is why the map features above are absent.\n res: [\"gold\", \"stone\", \"wood\", \"food\"],\n // singular — takes \"is\"\n unit: [\n \"knight\",\n \"archer\",\n \"villager\",\n \"monk\",\n \"skirmisher\",\n \"spearman\",\n \"scout\",\n ],\n // plural — takes \"are\"\n units: [\n \"knights\",\n \"archers\",\n \"villagers\",\n \"monks\",\n \"skirmishers\",\n \"spearmen\",\n \"scouts\",\n ],\n // singular — takes \"is\"\n bldg: [\n \"Town Center\",\n \"castle\",\n \"tower\",\n \"barracks\",\n \"stable\",\n \"blacksmith\",\n \"market\",\n ],\n // Dark Age is deliberately absent: you start there, you do not \"reach\" it.\n age: [\"Feudal Age\", \"Castle Age\", \"Imperial Age\"],\n // Generic noun for when chat types a bare adjective with nothing to attach it\n // to: \"!complaint dumb\" becomes \"F1re's game has been described as dumb\".\n thing: [\"game\", \"match\", \"build\", \"plan\", \"position\", \"situation\"],\n animal: [\"boar\", \"deer\", \"sheep\", \"wolf\"],\n};\n\n// Bare judgement words. \"!complaint dumb\" has no topic, and every TEMPLATE reads\n// {w} as a noun — which produced \"Somewhere a developer is being paid to\n// maintain dumb\". These route to MODIFIERS instead, where the word is treated as\n// a description, which is what it is.\n//\n// Words that are ALSO topic aliases (trash, slow, lucky) never reach this list:\n// the alias matches first and gives a better answer. Overlap is harmless.\nexport const ADJECTIVES = new Set([\n \"dumb\",\n \"stupid\",\n \"bad\",\n \"awful\",\n \"terrible\",\n \"horrible\",\n \"broken\",\n \"rigged\",\n \"unfair\",\n \"cringe\",\n \"weird\",\n \"strange\",\n \"odd\",\n \"sad\",\n \"painful\",\n \"cursed\",\n \"insane\",\n \"crazy\",\n \"ridiculous\",\n \"tragic\",\n \"embarrassing\",\n \"shameful\",\n \"scuffed\",\n \"jank\",\n \"janky\",\n \"questionable\",\n \"suspicious\",\n \"criminal\",\n \"disgusting\",\n \"pathetic\",\n \"useless\",\n \"pointless\",\n \"boring\",\n \"unlucky\",\n \"hilarious\",\n \"brutal\",\n \"rough\",\n \"rigged\",\n \"clown\",\n \"dogshit\",\n \"mid\",\n]);\n\nexport const TOPICS = {\n map: {\n aliases: [\n \"map\",\n \"maps\",\n \"mapgen\",\n \"generation\",\n \"arabia\",\n \"arena\",\n \"nomad\",\n \"seed\",\n \"spawn\",\n \"spawns\",\n \"hill\",\n \"hills\",\n \"woodline\",\n \"woodlines\",\n \"terrain\",\n ],\n noun: \"map\",\n lines: [\n \"The map seed was made by F1re's enemies to hide his sheep. His gold is forward, and the hill belongs to the other guy.\",\n \"F1re's {eco} is 14 tiles away. His opponent's {eco} is inside their Town Center. This is called map balance.\",\n \"F1re is not open. The MAP is open. There is a difference and he will explain it for 40 minutes.\",\n \"Arabia is the most balanced map in the game, except on F1re's half, where it is a documentary about scarcity.\",\n \"Both players got 4 boars. F1re's 4 boars are in the opponent's base. Working as intended.\",\n \"F1re's base has no hill. His opponent's base has a hill, a cliff, and what appears to be a moat.\",\n \"The gold is in the middle. The stone is in the middle. F1re is in the corner. Coincidence? F1re says no.\",\n \"Map generation is random and has produced the identical result against F1re 400 times.\",\n \"F1re would love this map if it were rotated 180 degrees.\",\n \"One player can full wall, the other must play open. Guess which one is streaming right now.\",\n \"The hills on this map are strategically placed to ensure F1re never has the high ground.\",\n \"The trees on this map are clearly biased against F1re's woodline.\",\n \"This map was generated fairly. It was then reviewed, adjusted, and generated again against F1re.\",\n \"F1re's gold is 20 tiles forward. His opponent's gold is behind two woodlines and a moral high ground.\",\n \"The map gave F1re a lake. F1re does not play water. The lake is where his wood should be.\",\n \"There are 8 relics on this map. Six spawned closer to the guy who is not F1re.\",\n \"F1re's base has three entrances. The recommended number of entrances is fewer.\",\n \"This map has a fair split down the middle. F1re got the half with the scenery.\",\n \"The {eco} is behind the enemy base. F1re would like to know who signed off on that.\",\n \"F1re's forward gold has a name now. The name is 'the reason'.\",\n \"The map is symmetrical. F1re has checked. F1re has checked several times.\",\n \"Both players have 2 gold piles. F1re's second pile is a rumour.\",\n \"The berries are 30 tiles away and have been since 2019.\",\n \"F1re got the corner spawn. Again. He is beginning to take it personally.\",\n \"The map generator has a random seed and a clear preference.\",\n \"There is one {eco} on F1re's side of the map and three on the other.\",\n \"Arena gives everyone stone walls. F1re still found a way to be open.\",\n \"Nomad is chaos for both players. Only one of them starts next to a lake.\",\n \"The terrain on F1re's side has a 40% slope and an opinion.\",\n \"Map generation ran 4000 times in testing and never once produced this.\",\n \"F1re has played 6000 maps. He remembers the 200 that wronged him.\",\n \"The mapgen script has a bug. F1re has not found it. F1re knows it is there.\",\n \"On Arena, F1re is safe, walled, and losing to a trebuchet he cannot see.\",\n \"Nomad means starting with nothing. F1re started with slightly less.\",\n \"The terrain hid an entire castle behind a hill 12 tiles from his base.\",\n \"Every map is playable. Some maps are playable and also fair.\",\n \"F1re's cliff blocks his own army and none of the enemy's.\",\n \"The map is called Arabia. F1re calls it other things.\",\n ],\n },\n\n walls: {\n aliases: [\n \"wall\",\n \"walls\",\n \"walling\",\n \"walled\",\n \"palisade\",\n \"palisades\",\n \"gate\",\n \"gates\",\n \"quickwall\",\n \"wallin\",\n ],\n noun: \"wall\",\n lines: [\n \"F1re had a full wall. One tile was palisade. That tile is now in a museum.\",\n \"The quick wall went down perfectly. The villager placing it disagreed and walked home.\",\n \"F1re's gate closed. The game logged it as open. These are the mysteries we live with.\",\n \"Nothing wrong with F1re's walls. There was simply a door where he did not build a door.\",\n \"F1re walled. The wall exists. The scout is inside anyway. Chat, this is a physics problem.\",\n \"The palisade sat at 1 HP for six minutes, then chose that exact moment.\",\n \"F1re placed a wall foundation and a deer stood on it. The deer had priority.\",\n \"F1re does not have a hole in his wall. He has an unfinished corridor with future potential.\",\n \"Stone walls cost stone. F1re had stone. The stone was in the other player's base.\",\n \"He walled off the entire base except one tile, which is statistically the tile the knights found.\",\n \"The wall was complete. The wall was reviewed. The wall had a door nobody ordered.\",\n \"F1re's palisade is load-bearing emotionally.\",\n \"F1re walled 47 tiles. The knights found the 48th in under a second.\",\n \"The gate was open because F1re opened it. This is the part he does not mention.\",\n \"His wall is 95% complete, which in walling terms is 0% complete.\",\n \"F1re quick-walled with 2 villagers. One walled. The other went to get wood.\",\n \"The palisade held for 8 seconds, which F1re says was long enough for a better player.\",\n \"He walled the front and forgot the back. The map only has a back on F1re's side.\",\n \"F1re's wall has a gap exactly one scout wide. The scout measured.\",\n \"The wall foundation was placed. The villager was then distracted by a tree.\",\n \"F1re built a gate so his army could leave. The enemy army also read the sign.\",\n \"The stone wall went up at minute 22. The attack was at minute 21.\",\n \"F1re walled off his own gold. Correctly, in the sense that nobody can reach it.\",\n \"There is a hole. There is always a hole. The hole is the entire point of walls.\",\n \"He walled in the sheep, the villagers, and one extremely confused enemy scout.\",\n \"F1re's palisade cost 2 wood and 40 minutes of consequences.\",\n \"The gate is open. F1re opened it in Feudal for a scout that never came back.\",\n \"He walled the ramp, the gap and the entrance, and forgot the cliff.\",\n \"F1re's stone wall has one gate. The gate is on the enemy's side.\",\n \"The wall went up. The wall went down. The wall was up for 11 seconds.\",\n \"F1re quick-walled a knight out and a knight in.\",\n \"A palisade has 250 HP. Knights do not respect the number.\",\n \"F1re walled his farms in and his villagers out.\",\n \"The enemy walked around a 40-tile wall in 6 seconds.\",\n \"F1re's gate is closed and his units are outside. Both are working as intended.\",\n \"He built the wall on the wrong side of his own gold.\",\n \"Palisade, stone wall, gate, tower. All four, in the wrong order, in one minute.\",\n ],\n },\n\n pathing: {\n aliases: [\n \"path\",\n \"paths\",\n \"pathing\",\n \"pathfinding\",\n \"unit\",\n \"units\",\n \"collision\",\n \"stuck\",\n \"movement\",\n \"moving\",\n \"army\",\n ],\n noun: \"pathing\",\n lines: [\n \"Pathing isn't broken; units are just protesting F1re's micro.\",\n \"F1re's knights took the scenic route. It was scenic. It went past three woodlines and a lake.\",\n \"The units are moving perfectly. They are simply moving perfectly somewhere else.\",\n \"F1re shift-queued four commands. The game heard one and interpreted it as jazz.\",\n \"Unit collision is a solved problem in every game except the one F1re is currently playing.\",\n \"F1re told 20 units to attack. 19 arrived. The 20th is still finding itself near the mill.\",\n \"Pathing has been patched 40 times. F1re's units read all 40 patch notes and disagreed.\",\n \"The army walked around the wall instead of through the gate. The gate was open. The gate was RIGHT THERE.\",\n \"The unit is not stuck. It is evaluating its options. It has been evaluating for eleven seconds.\",\n \"Two villagers met at a drop-off point and are now performing an interpretive dance.\",\n \"The developers fixed pathing. F1re's units did not receive the memo, as they are units.\",\n \"Pathing isn't broken; the units are just protesting F1re's leadership skills.\",\n \"F1re's units have formed a committee. The committee is standing near the mill.\",\n \"The {units} arrived 6 seconds late and refuse to explain the gap in their timeline.\",\n \"F1re's army split in two at a tree. One half is fighting. The other half is discovering the map.\",\n \"The siege took the long way around because the short way had a sheep in it.\",\n \"F1re boxed 30 units and 28 moved. The other 2 are appealing the decision.\",\n \"The unit walked into the wall, considered the wall, and walked into the wall again.\",\n \"His {units} pathed through the enemy Town Center, out the other side, and kept going.\",\n \"F1re gave one order. The army has interpreted it as a suggestion, then as a theme.\",\n \"Two units are trying to occupy the same tile. Neither will move. Both are F1re's.\",\n \"The army arrived in three separate waves, none of which F1re authorised.\",\n \"F1re's units found a shortcut. The shortcut was longer. They took it anyway.\",\n \"It walked past the fight. It has been briefed on the fight. It walked past the fight.\",\n \"Formations exist. F1re's units have heard of formations.\",\n \"F1re selected 30 {units}. 28 acknowledged the order.\",\n \"The {unit} has one job and has been doing a different job since Feudal Age.\",\n \"F1re's army is in formation. The formation is a queue.\",\n \"Two knights swapped places for 6 seconds and both died doing it.\",\n \"The unit reached its destination by a route that visited three woodlines.\",\n \"F1re's siege pushed his own knights into the enemy castle.\",\n \"The army split around a house and rejoined 40 tiles later, wiser.\",\n \"One villager is stuck between a farm and a mill and has been since Feudal.\",\n \"F1re issued a move command. The units performed a slow, considered drift.\",\n \"The knights arrived one at a time, which is also how they died.\",\n \"F1re's units respect walls, cliffs and trees more than they respect F1re.\",\n \"The unit walked to the target, past the target, and back to the target.\",\n \"Collision means 40 units take 12 seconds to leave one gate.\",\n \"F1re's army went around the lake. There was a bridge. There is always a bridge.\",\n ],\n },\n\n sheep: {\n aliases: [\n \"sheep\",\n \"boar\",\n \"boars\",\n \"deer\",\n \"hunt\",\n \"hunting\",\n \"straggler\",\n \"stragglers\",\n \"herd\",\n \"forage\",\n \"berries\",\n ],\n noun: \"boar\",\n lines: [\n \"Three sheep found. The fourth sheep is a myth passed down between F1re's villagers.\",\n \"The boar was lured correctly. It simply chose a different villager to be angry at.\",\n \"F1re's deer are behind a woodline. His opponent's deer are queuing politely at the Town Center.\",\n \"F1re found the sheep. They were under his opponent's Town Center, which is apparently where they spawn now.\",\n \"F1re's boar died 2 tiles from the drop-off. Two. Tiles.\",\n \"Straggler trees: F1re has one. His opponent has a forest arranged in a helpful semicircle.\",\n \"The sheep walked away from the Town Center. Nobody has explained why sheep do this. F1re has theories.\",\n \"The {animal} filed a complaint about F1re first. The {animal}'s complaint was upheld.\",\n \"The fourth sheep exists. It has simply chosen a life elsewhere.\",\n \"The boar is at 12 HP and F1re's villager is at 12 HP. One of them has a plan.\",\n \"He lured the boar perfectly into a wolf. Chat, that is two problems solving each other badly.\",\n \"The sheep are in a line. The line points away from F1re's Town Center.\",\n \"F1re's deer walked 6 tiles while being shot, which is 6 tiles of pure spite.\",\n \"The second boar is under the enemy Town Center. It is their boar now. It was always their boar.\",\n \"F1re's boar reached the Town Center and killed a villager on arrival, out of principle.\",\n \"His straggler tree is directly on the house foundation. Statistically it always is.\",\n \"F1re found 8 sheep. Four were the opponent's, which he learned later, loudly.\",\n \"The deer are hunting F1re at this point.\",\n \"F1re lured the boar into his own Town Center and then into his own villagers. It is his boar. He may do as he likes.\",\n \"The sheep spawned equidistant from both players and then made a decision.\",\n \"Every animal on this map has a plan. F1re has a build order. These are not the same.\",\n \"F1re pushed the deer for 40 seconds and moved them 3 tiles closer to the enemy.\",\n \"F1re's herd is four sheep and one with philosophical objections.\",\n \"The berries are 30 tiles away and guarded by a wolf with a schedule.\",\n \"Foraging is 6 villagers standing in a bush achieving 0.31 food per second.\",\n \"F1re's herd walked to the enemy Town Center and did not come back.\",\n \"The boar has 340 HP and killed 2 villagers on the way to the drop-off.\",\n \"He forgot to garrison during the boar lure. The villager forgot to survive.\",\n \"F1re's sheep are all on the far side of the Town Center. All of them.\",\n \"The berry bush is 4 tiles from the enemy and 30 from F1re.\",\n \"F1re herded 8 sheep perfectly and then forgot to eat any of them.\",\n \"The deer walked away mid-shot, out of principle.\",\n \"F1re's forage patch had 6 bushes. His opponent's had 6 bushes and a hill.\",\n \"Two boars, one villager, no plan.\",\n ],\n },\n\n scouting: {\n aliases: [\n \"scout\",\n \"scouts\",\n \"scouting\",\n \"scouted\",\n \"exploration\",\n \"explore\",\n \"exploring\",\n \"vision\",\n \"los\",\n \"sight\",\n \"reveal\",\n \"recon\",\n ],\n noun: \"scout\",\n lines: [\n \"F1re's scout didn't die; it took early retirement due to toxic work conditions.\",\n \"The scout has 8 line of sight and has used exactly 0 of it.\",\n \"F1re's scout found the enemy base, the enemy sheep, and none of his own.\",\n \"The scout is standing next to the sheep and has chosen not to mention it.\",\n \"F1re scouted clockwise. The entire game was happening counter-clockwise.\",\n \"F1re sent his scout out at 0:01 and received the first useful information at 14:00.\",\n \"The scout walked past the enemy Town Center twice. It is not on speaking terms with F1re.\",\n \"F1re's scout explored 4% of the map and filed a full report anyway.\",\n \"Exploration is free. F1re has somehow still been charged for it.\",\n \"The scout died in a corner of the map doing something F1re will never learn about.\",\n \"F1re knows exactly where the enemy is. He knows because they are already inside his base.\",\n \"The scout found gold, stone, relics and a wolf. It reported the wolf. In person. At speed.\",\n \"F1re's scout has line of sight, a horse, and no curiosity whatsoever.\",\n \"Scouting is 90% of the game, which is unfortunate, because F1re did 6% of it.\",\n \"F1re's scout came home empty and has been asked to explain itself.\",\n \"The enemy scout mapped F1re's entire base. F1re's scout found a tree it liked.\",\n \"F1re sent one scout in one direction and the map put everything in the other one.\",\n \"F1re has 40% map control and 0% map knowledge. These are separate statistics.\",\n \"The fog of war is lifting everywhere except the one tile that mattered.\",\n \"F1re's scout is alive, healthy, and 90 tiles from anything relevant.\",\n \"F1re has vision of 4% of the map and confidence about the other 96%.\",\n \"The recon told him nothing, arrived late, and cost 100 food.\",\n \"F1re's line of sight ends exactly where the enemy army begins.\",\n \"The fog revealed 40 knights. F1re would have preferred it stayed fogged.\",\n \"He had vision on the enemy base for 3 seconds and used none of it.\",\n \"The reveal at the end showed F1re everything he needed at minute 4.\",\n \"F1re scouted three corners. The enemy was in the fourth.\",\n \"Vision costs nothing. F1re still cannot afford it.\",\n \"His recon report was one sheep and a strong sense of unease.\",\n \"F1re had no vision of the tower until it had arrows.\",\n \"The scout revealed the map. F1re was reading chat.\",\n \"Line of sight 8, curiosity 0.\",\n ],\n },\n\n // \"gold\" and \"stone\" used to live in `map` (resource PLACEMENT). But chat\n // types \"!complaint no gold\" meaning DEPLETION, and got a woodline joke.\n // Depletion, trash wars and running dry are their own complaint.\n resources: {\n aliases: [\n \"gold\",\n \"stone\",\n \"wood\",\n \"food\",\n \"resource\",\n \"resources\",\n \"mining\",\n \"miner\",\n \"miners\",\n \"depleted\",\n \"deplete\",\n \"trash\",\n ],\n noun: \"gold\",\n lines: [\n \"F1re has 0 gold, 4000 food, and a plan that requires gold.\",\n \"The gold ran out at minute 34. F1re's strategy ran out at minute 12.\",\n \"Trash war. F1re has 60 halberdiers and no way to end this before dawn.\",\n \"F1re's gold is gone. His opponent's gold is behind three castles.\",\n \"There is gold on this map. It is under the enemy Town Center, as is traditional.\",\n \"F1re mined 800 gold and lost 900 gold of units defending the mine.\",\n \"The last gold pile holds 40 gold and 3 villagers standing around it hopefully.\",\n \"F1re went for relics. There were 5. His opponent had all 5 by minute 20.\",\n \"Out of {res}, out of {res2}, out of ideas, in that order.\",\n \"F1re has 3000 {res} and nothing that costs {res}.\",\n \"The wood is behind the enemy. The food is behind the enemy. F1re is in front of the enemy.\",\n \"90 villagers and 11 resources per second. Something is wrong and F1re says it is the pathing.\",\n \"He sold 500 food for gold, then spent the gold defending the food.\",\n \"Trash units are called trash because they are what F1re has left.\",\n \"The gold under the enemy castle is technically F1re's. It is also technically unreachable.\",\n \"F1re has been mining the same pile since Castle Age. It has 12 gold remaining.\",\n \"Every resource F1re needs is forward. Every resource he has is wood.\",\n \"F1re is not out of gold. F1re is between golds.\",\n \"The {res} ran out. F1re's plan did not adjust.\",\n \"F1re has {res} for one more fight and a plan that needs three.\",\n \"The gold depleted at minute 30 with 40 villagers standing on it.\",\n \"F1re has 900 stone and nothing worth building with it.\",\n \"Every pile F1re mines depletes four minutes before he is ready.\",\n \"The stone is depleted, the gold is depleted, and F1re is trending that way.\",\n \"F1re needs 650 stone for a castle. He has 640 and a decision to make.\",\n \"His last gold pile depleted mid-fight, which is the traditional moment.\",\n \"F1re has stone, wood, food and no gold. Three out of four is a trash war.\",\n \"The mining camp is 3 tiles wrong and will be for the next 30 minutes.\",\n \"F1re's opponent has 6000 banked. F1re has 40 and a plan.\",\n \"Depletion is inevitable. Depletion at minute 22 is a personal attack.\",\n \"He mined the forward gold for 90 seconds and lost 4 villagers doing it.\",\n \"F1re is farming, mining, chopping, and still somehow negative.\",\n ],\n },\n\n vills: {\n aliases: [\n \"vill\",\n \"vills\",\n \"villager\",\n \"villagers\",\n \"eco\",\n \"economy\",\n \"farm\",\n \"farms\",\n \"farming\",\n \"idle\",\n \"dropoff\",\n \"mill\",\n \"lumbercamp\",\n ],\n noun: \"villager\",\n lines: [\n \"The villager is not idle. The villager is between opportunities.\",\n \"F1re queued 5 villagers. The Town Center made 4 and kept one as a souvenir.\",\n \"The villager walked to the far woodline. There was a closer woodline. There is always a closer woodline.\",\n \"F1re double-clicked to select villagers and selected the entire economy, a house, and a sheep.\",\n \"The farm ran out 90 seconds ago. The villager standing on it did not want to bother anyone.\",\n \"F1re's villager auto-tasked onto gold. F1re wanted wood. The villager wanted a career change.\",\n \"There were 3 idle villagers. F1re says 0. The idle villager button says otherwise, and it has no reason to lie.\",\n \"A villager just walked past four trees to reach a fifth tree it prefers emotionally.\",\n \"Villagers walk two to three times the shortest path. It is documented. F1re did the documenting. Nothing happened.\",\n \"The drop-off is 1 tile away. The villager has chosen violence and a different drop-off.\",\n \"The villager is unionised and that drop-off is outside its jurisdiction.\",\n \"F1re has 3 idle villagers and 0 idle opinions.\",\n \"F1re made 3 villagers in a row and then none for 90 seconds. The Town Center was thinking.\",\n \"The villager is carrying 9 wood and has decided that is enough for today.\",\n \"A villager walked into the enemy base while building a house. It is their villager now.\",\n \"F1re rallied his villagers to gold. They arrived at gold. One went back for its things.\",\n \"The lumber camp is 1 tile too far. Over 30 minutes that is a whole villager of production.\",\n \"F1re's villager is repairing a building that is not under attack, with great focus.\",\n \"He queued 20 farms. 19 got placed. The 20th is a mystery the game will not discuss.\",\n \"The villager was building. Then it was not building. Nobody saw it stop.\",\n \"F1re has 84 villagers and the eco output of 60. The other 24 are consultants.\",\n \"The villager fleeing the raid ran directly into the raid.\",\n \"F1re's vills auto-repaired the wall instead of running, which is loyal and fatal.\",\n \"One villager has been walking since Feudal Age. It has commitments elsewhere.\",\n \"The drop-off changed hands mid-walk and the villager did not renegotiate.\",\n \"The mill is 8 tiles from the berries. Somebody made that decision.\",\n \"F1re built a mill, forgot the mill, and gathered by hand for four minutes.\",\n \"A villager walked from the mill to the Town Center carrying 3 food.\",\n \"F1re has 84 villagers. Eleven are doing something he asked for.\",\n \"The villager finished the farm and immediately stood still with pride.\",\n \"F1re's economy is excellent. It is also 40 tiles from the fight.\",\n \"One villager has walked 400 tiles today and gathered 11 wood.\",\n \"He deleted the wrong villager. It was the one carrying 10 gold.\",\n \"The lumber camp is up. The villagers are still walking to the old one.\",\n \"F1re's villagers are unionised, punctual, and going the wrong way.\",\n ],\n },\n\n lag: {\n aliases: [\n \"lag\",\n \"lagging\",\n \"ping\",\n \"server\",\n \"servers\",\n \"desync\",\n \"rubberband\",\n \"fps\",\n \"frames\",\n \"stutter\",\n \"disconnect\",\n \"internet\",\n \"connection\",\n ],\n noun: \"ping\",\n lines: [\n \"It was not a misclick. It was 180 ping and a server in a different hemisphere.\",\n \"F1re plays from Brazil. The server is in Europe. Every one of his clicks is an international flight.\",\n \"The game did not lag. It paused to think about what it had done.\",\n \"F1re's units teleported. That is not lag, chat, that is content.\",\n \"There was a spike. A small one. It lasted exactly as long as the fight F1re was losing.\",\n \"F1re issued the command. The server received it. Eventually. With love.\",\n \"Desync is when the game and F1re disagree about reality, and the game wins.\",\n \"F1re's ping is fine. F1re's ping to THAT server is a personality.\",\n \"Everyone had lag in that fight. Strangely, only F1re's units decided to stand still for it.\",\n \"South American ping is a civilization bonus nobody asked for.\",\n \"The lag is so bad it's actually affecting F1re's gameplay from three matches ago.\",\n \"The game isn't lagging. F1re is just playing in bullet-time mode.\",\n \"F1re's inputs are queued in Sao Paulo and delivered to Frankfurt by hand.\",\n \"The fight happened. F1re watched a slideshow of the fight. Different experiences.\",\n \"F1re clicked once. The game registered it twice, 4 seconds apart, in the wrong place.\",\n \"His units froze for 2 seconds, which in a fight is the entire fight.\",\n \"F1re has a 200ms handicap and a 0ms excuse allowance. Chat, do the ethics.\",\n \"The server is fine. The server is always fine. F1re is the one who is not fine.\",\n \"The game rubber-banded his knights back to where they were, and also emotionally.\",\n \"F1re's opponent has 12 ping. F1re's opponent lives inside the server.\",\n \"The lag lasted 400ms. F1re has been discussing it for 40 minutes. Proportional.\",\n \"It dropped a frame at the exact moment the mangonel fired. Every time. Only for F1re.\",\n \"F1re issued 6 commands during the spike. The server picked its favourite.\",\n \"Playing from South America is a 20-minute head start for everyone else.\",\n \"The replay shows F1re clicked correctly. The game did not attend the replay.\",\n \"F1re's FPS dropped to 12 during the only fight that mattered.\",\n \"The stutter lasted 300ms and removed 8 knights from history.\",\n \"His connection is stable. His connection to THAT server is a rumour.\",\n \"F1re has 240 FPS in the menu and 30 in a fight. The menu is not the problem.\",\n \"The stutter happens once a game, always during a mangonel shot, only for F1re.\",\n \"F1re's internet is fine. F1re's internet to Europe is a diplomatic issue.\",\n \"The connection dropped for 2 seconds. The game continued without him, badly.\",\n \"F1re reconnected to find his army somewhere he would never have sent it.\",\n \"40 FPS is playable. 40 FPS while 12 elephants arrive is a slideshow.\",\n \"The server is in Frankfurt. F1re is not. This has been true for six years.\",\n ],\n },\n\n balance: {\n aliases: [\n \"balance\",\n \"balanced\",\n \"civ\",\n \"civs\",\n \"civilization\",\n \"nerf\",\n \"nerfed\",\n \"buff\",\n \"buffed\",\n \"op\",\n \"overpowered\",\n \"imba\",\n \"unique\",\n \"matchup\",\n \"meta\",\n ],\n noun: \"balance\",\n lines: [\n \"That civ isn't overpowered. It just has every bonus F1re requested last year and was told was unreasonable.\",\n \"F1re doesn't think the civ is broken. F1re thinks the civ is aggressively encouraged.\",\n \"The unit is fine at 40 HP. F1re's unit also has 40 HP, and it is dead.\",\n \"Balance is a wheel. F1re is always standing under the part coming down.\",\n \"They buffed the civ, then the counter, then the counter to the counter. F1re just wanted the first thing to stop.\",\n \"F1re called that civ overpowered two years before the nerf. Nobody has apologised.\",\n \"The matchup isn't unwinnable. Winning it just requires being someone else.\",\n \"Their unique unit costs 60 food and does everything. F1re's costs 60 food and has a personality.\",\n \"Every civ is viable. Some civs are viable AND win.\",\n \"Balance nerfs arrive every patch. The bug F1re reported in 2021 has tenure.\",\n \"Clearly a civ win. Nothing to do with anything else. Purely the civ. Definitely.\",\n \"F1re's civ has a bonus. The bonus is that F1re is playing it.\",\n \"They balanced that unit by making it 3 gold cheaper. It still one-shots F1re.\",\n \"F1re's civ peaks in Imperial. F1re's games end in Castle. These two facts have never met.\",\n \"It isn't that his civ is weak. It's that his civ was designed by someone who had not met F1re.\",\n \"F1re has a 43% winrate with the strongest civ in the game. Chat, that took effort.\",\n \"The patch notes said minor adjustment. The unit now kills F1re in two fewer hits.\",\n \"Every civ has a weakness. His opponent's civ has a weakness in Post-Imperial, at 300 pop, on water.\",\n \"That civilization has 9 bonuses. F1re's has 4 and a strong flavour text.\",\n \"Imba is not a word F1re uses lightly. F1re uses it constantly.\",\n \"The meta shifted last patch. F1re shifted two patches ago.\",\n \"F1re plays the meta civ and loses to the off-meta one. Chat, explain.\",\n \"The civilization bonus applies from Dark Age. F1re's applies in Imperial.\",\n \"Every civ is balanced against every other civ except the one F1re is facing.\",\n \"The meta says archers. F1re made knights. The meta was right and rude about it.\",\n \"That is not imbalance, that is asymmetry. F1re rejects the distinction.\",\n \"F1re's civilization is A-tier on paper and B-tier in his hands.\",\n \"They nerfed the civ. It is still winning. F1re noticed.\",\n ],\n },\n\n elephants: {\n aliases: [\"elephant\", \"elephants\", \"ele\", \"eles\", \"battleele\", \"tusk\"],\n noun: \"elephant\",\n lines: [\n \"Elephants are balanced. They cost a lot, they move slowly, and nothing F1re owns can stop them.\",\n \"F1re shot the elephant 30 times. The elephant is now slightly annoyed.\",\n \"Elephants are fine because they are expensive. F1re's opponent had 40, so the expense was manageable.\",\n \"F1re countered the elephants correctly. The elephants were not aware of the counter system.\",\n \"An elephant walked into F1re's base and reorganised it.\",\n \"Elephants move at 0.85 speed, which gives F1re nine full seconds to understand what is about to happen.\",\n \"The elephant died and took the entire army with it. That is the elephant's whole plan.\",\n \"F1re says elephants should cost more. Chat, he means emotionally.\",\n \"The elephant has 250 HP, 3 armour, and a pension. F1re has arrows.\",\n \"F1re's counter to elephants is asking the elephants to reconsider.\",\n \"The elephant has been walking toward F1re's base since Castle Age. It will arrive. It is inevitable.\",\n \"F1re made halberdiers. The elephants turned the halberdiers into a story.\",\n \"One elephant is worth 3 knights and roughly 40 of F1re's arrows.\",\n \"The elephant took 11 seconds to die and killed 9 things on the way.\",\n \"F1re's monks converted an elephant. It was converted back. Net result: two sad monks.\",\n \"Elephants have low pierce armour, which F1re has tested extensively and personally.\",\n \"The elephant walked through the wall. Not the gate. The wall.\",\n \"F1re countered elephants with camels. The camels also found this funny.\",\n \"A single elephant is holding F1re's entire army in place like a traffic incident.\",\n \"The elephant is slow. F1re's economy is also slow. Only one of them is a problem.\",\n \"F1re says elephants are a Castle Age unit that behaves like an Imperial Age decision.\",\n \"Scorpions counter elephants. F1re's scorpions shot F1re's halberdiers instead.\",\n \"The elephant died at F1re's Town Center, 40 tiles further than it should have got.\",\n \"F1re watched 8 elephants cross the map and could do nothing except commentate.\",\n \"Elephants do not path well either, which is the only good news in this entire topic.\",\n \"The battle elephant has 250 HP, 3 armour and no reverse gear.\",\n \"F1re's counter to eles was pikemen. He made four.\",\n \"The tusks went through a spearman, a villager and a house.\",\n \"Eles are slow. F1re's response was slower.\",\n \"Battle elephants cost 120 food each. His opponent had 40 of them.\",\n \"One tusk swing hit three of F1re's units and a building he was repairing.\",\n \"F1re says eles should be a Castle Age unit. They are. That is the complaint.\",\n \"The elephant walked through the gate, the wall, and F1re's plan.\",\n \"Two eles and a monk ended a 40-minute game in 20 seconds.\",\n \"F1re counted the tusks. There were more elephants than he counted.\",\n ],\n },\n\n monks: {\n aliases: [\n \"monk\",\n \"monks\",\n \"conversion\",\n \"convert\",\n \"converted\",\n \"wololo\",\n \"relic\",\n \"relics\",\n \"faith\",\n \"redemption\",\n ],\n noun: \"monk\",\n lines: [\n \"The conversion was random. It was random 5 times in a row, in the same direction.\",\n \"Wololo is not a sound. It is a personal message to F1re.\",\n \"F1re's monk failed for 12 seconds. The enemy monk took his trebuchet instantly. Both are RNG.\",\n \"F1re lost his onager to a monk. The onager did not resist. The onager wanted this.\",\n \"The relic was 3 tiles from F1re's monk and 30 from the opponent's. Chat knows how this ended.\",\n \"Monks heal, convert, and carry relics. F1re's monks have chosen to specialise in standing still.\",\n \"Conversion resistance exists. It has never once existed on F1re's units.\",\n \"F1re says monk RNG is not random. F1re says monk RNG has read his profile.\",\n \"He researched Faith for 750 gold. His scout got converted four minutes later anyway.\",\n \"Pros agree monk RNG is unfun to play with and against. F1re agrees loudest.\",\n \"The monk converted on the very first tick. It was F1re's monk being converted, but still, first tick.\",\n \"Monk RNG is 50/50. F1re has run the experiment 900 times and formally disagrees.\",\n \"F1re's monk has been converting the same knight for 14 seconds. The knight is unbothered.\",\n \"One enemy monk converted three units. F1re's four monks converted a sense of injustice.\",\n \"The monk picked up the relic and immediately walked toward the enemy castle.\",\n \"F1re built a monastery to counter monks. His monks were converted first.\",\n \"Wololo has a 0% failure rate when aimed at F1re's best unit.\",\n \"The monk healed a unit that was already full and ignored the one that was dying.\",\n \"F1re's paladin was converted, upgraded, and used against him within 40 seconds.\",\n \"Redemption converts buildings. F1re's opponent redeemed F1re's castle.\",\n \"The relic was in F1re's base. It is now not in F1re's base. No monk was seen.\",\n \"F1re's monk stopped to heal mid-conversion, like a professional with priorities.\",\n \"Four monks, one relic, zero relics collected. The maths is upsetting.\",\n \"The conversion took 2 seconds and 6 years off F1re's life.\",\n \"Monks move at 0.7 speed and arrive at every fight exactly once it is over.\",\n \"The monk converted, walked forward, and converted again. It is on a run.\",\n \"F1re's relic cart got converted. That should not be possible. It happened.\",\n \"Four monks, 800 gold, and one converted spearman to show for it.\",\n \"The monk healed the unit that was fine and ignored the one at 4 HP.\",\n \"F1re's monks reached the relic three seconds after the enemy's.\",\n \"Wololo, and F1re's onager is now facing the wrong way, permanently.\",\n \"The enemy monk is at 90% conversion and F1re is at 0% attention.\",\n \"F1re built a monastery in Imperial. The relics went in Castle.\",\n \"One monk beat a siege line that cost 900 resources.\",\n \"F1re's monk has been walking to the fight since the fight started.\",\n ],\n },\n\n siege: {\n aliases: [\n \"siege\",\n \"mangonel\",\n \"mango\",\n \"onager\",\n \"trebuchet\",\n \"treb\",\n \"trebs\",\n \"ram\",\n \"rams\",\n \"scorpion\",\n \"bombard\",\n \"cannon\",\n \"petard\",\n ],\n noun: \"siege\",\n lines: [\n \"The mangonel hit F1re's own knights. In its defence, they were closer.\",\n \"F1re's onager fired into his own army with the confidence of a unit that has never been questioned.\",\n \"The trebuchet packed up. F1re did not ask it to pack up. It felt it was time.\",\n \"The ram is carrying F1re's infantry, which is why the infantry is nowhere near the fight.\",\n \"Scorpions fire in a line. F1re's line consisted mostly of F1re.\",\n \"The bombard cannon missed. It has 100% accuracy and it missed. Chat, sit with that.\",\n \"F1re's siege arrived. The battle had moved. The siege stayed to appreciate the terrain.\",\n \"The mangonel had one job, did it, and the job turned out to be F1re's knights.\",\n \"Friendly fire was added to stop mangonels being overpowered. It has mostly stopped F1re.\",\n \"The trebuchet is still unpacking. There is no rush, apparently.\",\n \"The mangonel is not friendly-firing. The mangonel is providing feedback.\",\n \"F1re's onager has a 100% hit rate on F1re.\",\n \"One mangonel shot removed 40 archers, 2 monks, and F1re's entire theory of the game.\",\n \"F1re built 3 rams. They are currently ramming a house.\",\n \"The trebuchet has 16 range and took 11 seconds to decide to use it.\",\n \"F1re's siege has a 20-knight escort. The siege has chosen a different route to the knights.\",\n \"The onager killed 9 units. Six of them were wearing F1re's colour.\",\n \"Petards are cheap, fast, and detonate near whatever F1re valued most.\",\n \"F1re's mangonel was set to Attack Ground. F1re had not selected the ground.\",\n \"The trebuchet packed, walked 6 tiles, and unpacked facing nothing.\",\n \"F1re's rams are full of infantry and parked outside a house.\",\n \"One onager shot: nine kills, six of them F1re's.\",\n \"The scorpion fired down a line F1re's own knights were standing in.\",\n \"F1re's bombard cannon reloaded for 6 seconds and then missed a building.\",\n \"The mangonel is on the hill. The fight is not on the hill.\",\n \"F1re built four trebuchets and used one, badly, on a house.\",\n \"Siege is slow, expensive and decisive. F1re has the first two.\",\n \"The ram absorbed 40 arrows and delivered five infantry into a castle.\",\n \"F1re's siege line is beautiful, expensive, and pointing at nothing.\",\n ],\n },\n\n timing: {\n aliases: [\n \"timing\",\n \"uptime\",\n \"uptimes\",\n \"castle\",\n \"imp\",\n \"imperial\",\n \"feudal\",\n \"dark\",\n \"darkage\",\n \"age\",\n \"buildorder\",\n \"bo\",\n \"late\",\n \"slow\",\n \"fast\",\n ],\n noun: \"timing\",\n lines: [\n \"F1re clicked up on time. The Town Center processed the request at its own pace.\",\n \"His opponent hit Castle 2 minutes earlier. F1re had a better plan and 2 fewer minutes.\",\n \"F1re was 30 seconds late to Feudal because of a boar-related incident he will not discuss.\",\n \"The uptime was fine. The up part was fine. It was the time part.\",\n \"F1re had the resources for Imperial. He also had 4 idle villagers. These facts are related.\",\n \"Dark Age is 8 minutes for everyone. Only F1re's 8 minutes contain a wolf, a lame, and a lost scout.\",\n \"F1re did not click up late. F1re clicked up thoughtfully.\",\n \"The build order was perfect until minute 3, when the map got involved.\",\n \"The plan needed 27 villagers by Castle. The map provided sheep for 21.\",\n \"F1re reached {age} at a time. It was a time. It was not the time.\",\n \"If complaining were a resource, F1re would be up three ages.\",\n \"His opponent clicked Imperial while F1re was still explaining why he hadn't.\",\n \"F1re calls 27:14 a good Imperial time. It was a 1v1. On Arabia.\",\n \"F1re went up at 2:15 with 22 pop and no explanation for either number.\",\n \"The build order says wait for the third sheep. F1re has been waiting since 2019.\",\n \"F1re saved 4 seconds on his uptime and lost 40 of them to a wolf.\",\n \"His opponent's uptime was 30 seconds faster and 100% less interesting.\",\n \"F1re is never late. F1re arrives precisely when the fight is already over.\",\n \"F1re reached {age} 90 seconds after it would have been useful.\",\n \"F1re's timing is perfect. The game's timing is different, and the game keeps score.\",\n \"The timing attack arrived 40 seconds after the timing window closed.\",\n \"F1re's Castle timing is 2 minutes off and his explanation is 12 minutes long.\",\n \"Good timing wins games. F1re has excellent timing, applied slightly late.\",\n \"The push was timed for minute 18. It left at 18 and arrived at 22.\",\n \"F1re's uptime is slow because the sheep were slow because the scout was slow.\",\n \"He clicked up 4 seconds faster than last game and is calling it progress.\",\n \"F1re is not slow. F1re is thorough, and thorough takes two extra minutes.\",\n \"The timing was there. F1re was not.\",\n \"His opponent's timings are crisp. F1re's timings are described as eventually.\",\n ],\n },\n\n opponent: {\n aliases: [\n \"opponent\",\n \"enemy\",\n \"smurf\",\n \"smurfs\",\n \"lame\",\n \"lamer\",\n \"laming\",\n \"lamed\",\n \"cheese\",\n \"cheesed\",\n \"drush\",\n \"trush\",\n \"rush\",\n \"towerrush\",\n \"noob\",\n ],\n noun: \"opponent\",\n lines: [\n \"That is not a 1200 player. That is a 2100 player wearing a 1200 account as a disguise.\",\n \"He lamed F1re's boar at minute 2 and typed gg at minute 4. That is a hate crime with extra steps.\",\n \"Drush into fast castle into tower rush is not a build order, that is a cry for help.\",\n \"The opponent walled up and teched for 40 minutes. F1re calls it cowardice. The scoreboard calls it 1-0.\",\n \"F1re's opponent has 3 accounts, 900 elo on all of them, and 2100 elo hands.\",\n \"He built a tower in F1re's gold and then apologised in chat, which somehow made it worse.\",\n \"The opponent did nothing for 30 minutes and then did exactly one thing perfectly.\",\n \"F1re saw the cheese coming, called the cheese, countered the cheese, and lost to the cheese.\",\n \"F1re's opponent found F1re's sheep before F1re did. In F1re's base. Chat.\",\n \"Clearly a civ win. F1re's opponent had the hidden ability of playing better.\",\n \"His opponent isn't better, they just have a more expensive gaming chair.\",\n \"The opponent didn't outplay F1re. The opponent was simply allowed to do things.\",\n \"He made 40 spearmen and won. There is no counter to a man who has stopped thinking.\",\n \"3000 games and 900 elo. Chat, that is not a rating, that is a lifestyle.\",\n \"He proxied a barracks in F1re's blind spot. F1re did not have a blind spot before today.\",\n \"F1re's opponent misclicked into the winning position and has not been asked to explain.\",\n \"The opponent went for the exact strategy F1re called unviable on stream that morning.\",\n \"He took F1re's boar, F1re's deer, and F1re's will to continue, in that order.\",\n \"F1re scouted the base at minute 5. His opponent built everything at minute 6, deliberately.\",\n \"He is 300 elo lower and played the single best game of his life. Both facts are load-bearing.\",\n \"F1re's opponent typed nothing all game. Loudest silence in the history of this ladder.\",\n \"The opponent's APM is 40. F1re's is 280. The scoreboard remains unmoved.\",\n \"He won a fight he had no business winning and did not have the decency to look surprised.\",\n \"F1re's opponent alt-tabbed for 2 minutes and came back with a bigger army.\",\n \"He smurfed, lamed, cheesed, and then typed good game. Two of those words were true.\",\n \"The enemy laming F1re's boar at minute 2 is not strategy, it is a hobby.\",\n \"He trushed, walled and teched. F1re calls that three separate crimes.\",\n \"The noob who beat F1re had 400 games and a plan.\",\n \"F1re's enemy played badly for 30 minutes and correctly for 40 seconds.\",\n \"Laming is legal. F1re would like that reviewed by a higher authority.\",\n \"The trush arrived at minute 9 with two villagers and total confidence.\",\n \"His enemy went scouts on Arena. It should not have worked. It worked.\",\n \"F1re got trushed by a player he had called harmless on stream that morning.\",\n \"The enemy has no build order, no upgrades, and a four-game win streak.\",\n \"He lamed the boar, the deer and the sheep, then apologised for one of them.\",\n ],\n },\n};",[138],"74827dda-ba0a-462f-aca9-f70b01271fc4","complaint.http.ts",20,["D",1788357150480],14,"http","// @ts-nocheck: plain JavaScript file, parameters are intentionally untyped\n//\n// !complaint — Nightbot custom API for F1re's Twitch stream.\n// Runtime: Val Town HTTP val. No dependencies, no build step.\n//\n// Nightbot command (500-char limit; this is ~95):\n// !addcom -cd=5 !complaint $(urlfetch https://f1re.val.run/?q=$(querystring)&by=$(user))\n//\n// The 32 topics live in topics.js. This file holds the smaller shared pools\n// (templates, wildcards, combos, modifiers, tags, blocklists) and the matching\n// logic below the LOGIC banner. Split because Val Town caps a file at 80,000\n// characters.\n\nimport { ADJECTIVES, SLOTS, TOPICS } from \"./topics.js\";\nexport { ADJECTIVES, SLOTS, TOPICS };\n\n// Slot-fill lines for words that matched nothing. {w} = the sanitized word.\n// These must read well with ANY noun, so keep them structural, not specific.\nexport const TEMPLATES = [\n \"F1re says the {w} is not the problem. The problem is that the {w} exists.\",\n \"There is no {w} issue. There is a {w} conspiracy, and F1re is its main victim.\",\n \"F1re filed a formal complaint about {w}. It was marked working as intended.\",\n \"The {w} was fine until F1re looked at it.\",\n \"F1re's {w} works perfectly in practice. On stream it develops opinions.\",\n \"Chat, the {w} is a known bug. It has been known since 1999.\",\n \"F1re would have won that game if {w} had been implemented correctly.\",\n \"They nerfed {w} in a patch note nobody read. F1re read it. F1re is still upset.\",\n \"F1re's {w} has been under review by the pathing team for six years.\",\n \"Statistically, {w} only malfunctions while F1re is streaming. Statistically.\",\n \"{w}? F1re does not complain about {w}. F1re documents {w}.\",\n \"F1re tried {w} once. He is still filling out the incident report.\",\n \"The {w} is balanced. F1re is simply playing against the {w}.\",\n \"Nothing is wrong with {w}. It just happens to hate F1re specifically.\",\n \"F1re has a 400-page slideshow about {w}. Slide 1 is the word {w} in red.\",\n \"The {w} has been reported to HR. The {w} does not have HR.\",\n \"F1re's {w} is on strike over working conditions.\",\n \"If complaining about {w} gave resources, F1re would be in Imperial.\",\n \"Clearly a {w} win. Nothing to do with anything else. Purely the {w}.\",\n \"The {w} isn't broken; it is just protesting F1re's leadership skills.\",\n \"The {w} has been added to F1re's list. The list has a waiting list.\",\n \"F1re's {w} is technically functional, which is the most F1re can say about it.\",\n \"Chat, nobody is saying {w} is rigged. F1re is saying {w} is rigged.\",\n \"The {w} works fine for everyone else, which F1re considers the most suspicious part.\",\n \"F1re has requested a formal review of {w}. He is also the review board.\",\n \"In a fair game the {w} would behave. F1re has never been in a fair game.\",\n \"{w} is not in the patch notes, which is exactly how F1re knows they changed it.\",\n \"F1re has never once had a good experience with {w}. Not once. He has a spreadsheet.\",\n \"The {w} is not the issue. The issue is that {w} was allowed to happen at all.\",\n \"Somewhere a developer is being paid to maintain {w}. F1re would like a word.\",\n \"F1re's relationship with {w} is professional, distant, and deteriorating.\",\n \"{w} has never cost anyone else a game. F1re finds that statistic suspicious.\",\n \"The {w} was fine last patch. F1re cannot prove it changed. F1re knows it changed.\",\n \"F1re does not want {w} removed. F1re wants {w} to explain itself.\",\n \"There is a version of {w} that works. F1re has never been served that version.\",\n \"F1re accounted for everything except {w}, which is the one thing that happened.\",\n \"Chat, if you take one thing from this stream, let it be F1re's position on {w}.\",\n \"The {w} has now cost F1re more games than any opponent has.\",\n \"F1re raised {w} in 2019. He raised it again today. The gap contains no progress.\",\n \"Nobody is blaming {w}. F1re is simply mentioning {w}, at length, with examples.\",\n];\n\n// Used for bare !complaint, and as the silent landing spot for rejected input.\nexport const WILDCARDS = [\n \"F1re has no specific complaint at this time, which is itself suspicious.\",\n \"F1re's grievance queue is currently 14 items deep. Please hold.\",\n \"Everything is fine. F1re is fine. The game is fine. Nobody is fine.\",\n \"F1re would like it noted, for the record, that he saw this coming.\",\n \"There is nothing wrong with the game. There is something wrong with the game and F1re, specifically.\",\n \"F1re is not tilted. F1re is annotated.\",\n \"In F1re's defence: the map, the ping, the patch, the teammate, and the wolf.\",\n \"F1re has accepted that this game is happening to him rather than being played by him.\",\n \"{by}, F1re shares your concerns, whatever they were.\",\n \"F1re does not complain. F1re provides commentary with a strong point of view.\",\n \"The replay will show F1re was right. The replay always shows F1re was right. Nobody watches the replay.\",\n \"F1re filed this under things that only happen to me. It is a large folder.\",\n \"Somewhere there is a game where nothing goes wrong for F1re. It is not this one.\",\n \"F1re is calm. F1re has been calm for the entire 3 seconds since that happened.\",\n \"If complaining gave gold, F1re would be clicking Imp at 10 minutes.\",\n \"F1re's excuses have better uptime than his Castle Age.\",\n \"F1re has escalated this to a higher authority. There is no higher authority.\",\n \"F1re has 31 categories of complaint and is currently workshopping a 32nd.\",\n \"The game is fine. F1re is fine. The wolf is thriving.\",\n \"F1re would like to speak to whoever is in charge of this specific game.\",\n \"Nothing has gone wrong yet, which F1re finds deeply concerning.\",\n \"F1re has been complaining for 6 hours and has not repeated himself once.\",\n \"This one is going in the folder. The folder needed a second folder.\",\n];\n\n// Two topics named in one query (\"!complaint walls pathing\"). {a} and {b} are\n// the two topics' noun labels, in the order the viewer typed them.\nexport const COMBOS = [\n \"F1re has two complaints here: the {a} and the {b}. He will address both. At length.\",\n \"That was the {a}, made worse by the {b}. F1re would like both entered into the record.\",\n \"Two things went wrong: the {a} and the {b}. Only one of them can be patched.\",\n \"The {a} failed. Then the {b} failed. F1re was merely present.\",\n \"F1re blames the {a}. F1re also blames the {b}. These are not competing theories.\",\n \"It was the {a}. It was also the {b}. Chat, it was a collaboration.\",\n \"The {a} and the {b} have never worked together until they worked together against F1re.\",\n \"F1re could have survived the {a}. F1re could have survived the {b}. Not both.\",\n \"One {a} problem plus one {b} problem is not two problems. It is a loss.\",\n \"The {b} would have been fine without the {a}. And the reverse. This is the trap.\",\n \"F1re has filed this under {a}, and under {b}. The folder system is straining.\",\n \"When the {a} and the {b} go wrong in the same minute, that is not luck, that is a pattern.\",\n \"The {a} set it up. The {b} finished it. F1re watched the handoff.\",\n \"Between the {a} and the {b} there was a version of this game F1re wins.\",\n \"F1re would like to complain about the {a} first, then the {b}, then the {a} again.\",\n \"It is never just the {a}. It is the {a} and then, inevitably, the {b}.\",\n \"The {a} was survivable. Then the {b} arrived with an opinion.\",\n \"Two systems failed F1re today: the {a} and the {b}. Neither has apologised.\",\n \"F1re suspects the {a} problem and the {b} problem are the same problem.\",\n \"The {a} let it happen. The {b} made it permanent.\",\n \"First the {a}, then the {b}. F1re is beginning to think this is scripted.\",\n \"The {a} and the {b} in one game is statistically unlikely and personally routine.\",\n \"F1re cannot decide whether to blame the {a} or the {b}, so he is doing both, alphabetically.\",\n \"Remove the {a} and F1re wins. Remove the {b} and F1re wins. He got neither.\",\n \"The {a} is a known issue. The {b} is a known issue. Together they are a genre.\",\n \"F1re prepared for the {a}. Nobody prepares for the {a} AND the {b}.\",\n \"The {b} arrived while F1re was still writing his complaint about the {a}.\",\n \"Chat, the {a} is simply wearing a {b} costume.\",\n \"F1re has ranked them: the {a} first, the {b} a close and infuriating second.\",\n \"If the {a} had held, the {b} would never have mattered. It did not hold.\",\n \"The {a} and the {b}, in the same game, on the same map, to the same person.\",\n \"F1re would like it known that the {a} started it and the {b} escalated it.\",\n];\n\n// One topic plus a describing word (\"!complaint weird wall\"). {adj} is the word\n// the viewer used, {noun} is the topic's label. Deliberately written without\n// \"a {adj} {noun}\" so uncountable labels like \"pathing\" still read correctly.\nexport const MODIFIERS = [\n \"F1re's {noun} has been described as {adj}. F1re disputes the characterisation.\",\n \"The {noun} has been called {adj}. F1re would like to see the evidence.\",\n \"Chat has settled on {adj} for that {noun}. F1re has settled on something else.\",\n \"{adj}? F1re prefers the term adaptive.\",\n \"F1re has heard {adj} used about his {noun} before. He is used to it.\",\n \"The word for that {noun} is not {adj}. The word is contextual.\",\n \"F1re will accept {adj} once someone explains what the alternative was.\",\n \"Yes, {adj}. F1re is aware. F1re was there.\",\n \"The {noun} was already {adj} by the time F1re got to it. He inherited it.\",\n \"Calling it {adj} is generous. F1re would have gone further.\",\n \"F1re has logged the feedback that his {noun} was {adj}. It joins the pile.\",\n \"{adj} is a strong word for something that was doing its best.\",\n \"F1re did not set out to make the {noun} {adj}. The map insisted.\",\n \"The {noun} became {adj} at the exact moment F1re stopped watching it.\",\n \"F1re's {noun} is {adj} in the same way the map is fair.\",\n \"The {noun} could be {adj} or it could be absent. F1re chose {adj}.\",\n \"The {noun} was fine until chat decided it was {adj}.\",\n \"F1re would like the record to show the {noun} was {adj} out of necessity.\",\n \"Nobody's {noun} has ever escaped being called {adj} by chat.\",\n \"That {noun} is not {adj}. That {noun} is misunderstood.\",\n \"The {noun} being {adj} is a symptom. The map is the disease.\",\n \"{adj} {noun}, sure. Show F1re the version that would have worked.\",\n \"It is {adj} because the game made it {adj} first.\",\n \"F1re has been told the {noun} looked {adj}. From the inside it looked worse.\",\n \"Chat, calling the {noun} {adj} implies there is a normal {noun}. There has never been a normal {noun}.\",\n \"The {adj} {noun} was the correct response to everything else being {adj}.\",\n \"F1re's {noun} was {adj} for 4 seconds and correct for the other 40 minutes.\",\n \"Every {noun} looks {adj} until you know what F1re was working with.\",\n \"F1re did not make the {noun} {adj}. The game did that part.\",\n \"The {noun} is {adj}. The thing that caused it remains unexamined.\",\n \"F1re accepts {adj}. F1re does not accept that it was his fault.\",\n \"One man's {adj} {noun} is another man's only remaining option.\",\n \"The {adj} part is not the {noun}. The {adj} part is that it almost worked.\",\n \"F1re has filed a complaint about being told his {noun} is {adj}.\",\n \"{adj} is what it looks like. Necessary is what it was.\",\n];\n\n// Rung 5: catches words never listed as an alias. Tested against the whole\n// normalized query. First match wins, so keep specific patterns above broad ones.\n// Rung 5 catches words that were never listed as an alias. These are plain word\n// stems, NOT regexes — the compiler below anchors every one of them to a word\n// start, which is the whole point.\n//\n// The unanchored version of this list shipped a real bug: \"ratio\" matched\n// explo-RATIO-n, so \"!complaint exploration\" answered with trade jokes. The same\n// flaw sat in \"hous\" (t-HOUS-and), \"rage\" (ave-RAGE), \"fish\" (sel-FISH) and\n// \"strat\" (admini-STRAT-ion). Anchoring kills the whole class.\n//\n// stems: matches at a word START, any ending -> \"upgrad\" catches \"upgrading\"\n// words: must be the WHOLE word -> \"tower\" does not catch \"towerrush\"\n//\n// First match wins, so keep specific topics above broad ones.\n//\n// Compiled below into `TAGS`, where each entry keeps its `stems`/`words` and\n// gains a `re`. heckle.js iterates TAGS and uses `t.re`, so that field is part\n// of the module's public shape — do not drop it.\nconst TAG_SPEC = [\n { stems: [\"wolf\", \"wolv\", \"ornlu\"], topic: \"wolves\" },\n { stems: [\"eleph\"], topic: \"elephants\" },\n { stems: [\"monk\", \"conver\", \"relic\", \"wololo\"], topic: \"monks\" },\n {\n stems: [\"siege\", \"mango\", \"onager\", \"treb\", \"scorpion\", \"bombard\"],\n topic: \"siege\",\n },\n {\n stems: [\n \"archer\",\n \"arrow\",\n \"ballist\",\n \"skirm\",\n \"crossbow\",\n \"arbalest\",\n \"xbow\",\n ],\n topic: \"archers\",\n },\n {\n stems: [\n \"knight\",\n \"cavalr\",\n \"camel\",\n \"hussar\",\n \"paladin\",\n \"lancer\",\n \"pike\",\n \"halb\",\n \"spear\",\n ],\n topic: \"cavalry\",\n },\n // \"tower\" is whole-word so \"towerrush\" still falls through to opponent below.\n {\n words: [\"tower\", \"towers\", \"tc\"],\n stems: [\n \"towncenter\",\n \"barrack\",\n \"stable\",\n \"blacksmith\",\n \"universit\",\n \"outpost\",\n \"wonder\",\n ],\n topic: \"buildings\",\n },\n {\n words: [\"pop\"],\n stems: [\"hous\", \"population\", \"popcap\", \"supply\"],\n topic: \"housing\",\n },\n {\n stems: [\n \"upgrad\",\n \"bloodline\",\n \"fletch\",\n \"forging\",\n \"wheelbarrow\",\n \"handcart\",\n \"husbandry\",\n \"tech\",\n ],\n topic: \"upgrades\",\n },\n {\n stems: [\"market\", \"trade\", \"tribut\", \"ratio\", \"coinage\", \"banking\"],\n topic: \"market\",\n },\n {\n words: [\"sea\"],\n stems: [\n \"water\",\n \"naval\",\n \"navy\",\n \"galley\",\n \"fireship\",\n \"dock\",\n \"fish\",\n \"transport\",\n \"boat\",\n \"shore\",\n ],\n topic: \"water\",\n },\n { stems: [\"taunt\", \"emote\"], topic: \"taunts\" },\n {\n words: [\"obs\", \"mic\"],\n stems: [\n \"microphone\",\n \"webcam\",\n \"encoder\",\n \"bitrate\",\n \"overlay\",\n \"vod\",\n \"headset\",\n ],\n topic: \"streamtech\",\n },\n {\n stems: [\n \"tournam\",\n \"tourney\",\n \"bracket\",\n \"draft\",\n \"showmatch\",\n \"qualifier\",\n \"caster\",\n \"prize\",\n ],\n topic: \"tournament\",\n },\n {\n words: [\"rng\", \"odds\"],\n stems: [\"luck\", \"random\", \"variance\"],\n topic: \"luck\",\n },\n {\n words: [\"gg\"],\n stems: [\"resign\", \"tilt\", \"losing\", \"loss\", \"rage\", \"quit\", \"defeat\"],\n topic: \"resign\",\n },\n {\n stems: [\n \"strat\",\n \"greed\",\n \"boom\",\n \"allin\",\n \"all in\",\n \"all-in\",\n \"macro\",\n \"micro\",\n \"gameplan\",\n ],\n topic: \"strategy\",\n },\n {\n stems: [\n \"lag\",\n \"ping\",\n \"desync\",\n \"rubber\",\n \"server\",\n \"fps\",\n \"stutter\",\n \"frame\",\n \"discon\",\n ],\n topic: \"lag\",\n },\n {\n stems: [\"flank\", \"pocket\", \"teammate\", \"ally\", \"allies\"],\n topic: \"teammates\",\n },\n { stems: [\"wall\", \"gate\", \"palisad\"], topic: \"walls\" },\n { stems: [\"path\", \"stuck\", \"collid\", \"collision\"], topic: \"pathing\" },\n { stems: [\"scout\", \"explor\", \"vision\", \"reveal\"], topic: \"scouting\" },\n {\n stems: [\n \"sheep\",\n \"boar\",\n \"deer\",\n \"hunt\",\n \"forag\",\n \"straggler\",\n \"herd\",\n \"berri\",\n ],\n topic: \"sheep\",\n },\n {\n stems: [\n \"gold\",\n \"stone\",\n \"wood\",\n \"food\",\n \"resource\",\n \"mining\",\n \"deplet\",\n \"trash\",\n ],\n topic: \"resources\",\n },\n {\n stems: [\n \"vill\",\n \"farm\",\n \"econom\",\n \"dropoff\",\n \"drop off\",\n \"drop-off\",\n \"lumber\",\n ],\n topic: \"vills\",\n },\n {\n stems: [\"hotkey\", \"keybind\", \"misclick\", \"minimap\", \"mouse\", \"keyboard\"],\n topic: \"hotkeys\",\n },\n {\n stems: [\"smurf\", \"lame\", \"cheese\", \"drush\", \"trush\", \"rush\"],\n topic: \"opponent\",\n },\n {\n stems: [\"elo\", \"ladder\", \"rank\", \"mmr\", \"matchmak\", \"queue\"],\n topic: \"elo\",\n },\n { stems: [\"bug\", \"glitch\", \"patch\", \"dev\", \"dlc\", \"update\"], topic: \"devs\" },\n {\n stems: [\"nerf\", \"buff\", \"overpower\", \"imba\", \"balanc\", \"civ\"],\n topic: \"balance\",\n },\n {\n stems: [\n \"arabia\",\n \"arena\",\n \"nomad\",\n \"mapgen\",\n \"spawn\",\n \"terrain\",\n \"woodline\",\n ],\n topic: \"map\",\n },\n {\n stems: [\n \"castle\",\n \"imperial\",\n \"feudal\",\n \"darkage\",\n \"dark age\",\n \"uptime\",\n \"buildorder\",\n \"build order\",\n ],\n topic: \"timing\",\n },\n { stems: [\"chat\", \"viewer\", \"backseat\", \"stream\", \"donat\"], topic: \"chat\" },\n];\n\n// Substring stems. Checked AFTER leetspeak folding and stripping non-letters,\n// so n1gg / f4g style bypasses are caught. A false positive is harmless: the\n// reply silently falls back to a wildcard. Err aggressive. Add stems freely.\nconst BLOCK = [\n \"nigg\",\n \"nigr\",\n \"negr\",\n \"fagg\",\n \"retard\",\n \"tranny\",\n \"chink\",\n \"kike\",\n \"spic\",\n \"gook\",\n \"wetback\",\n \"beaner\",\n \"coon\",\n \"groyper\",\n \"kkk\",\n \"hitler\",\n \"nazi\",\n \"rape\",\n \"rapis\",\n \"pedo\",\n \"molest\",\n \"whore\",\n \"slut\",\n \"cunt\",\n \"bitch\",\n \"dick\",\n \"cock\",\n \"penis\",\n \"vagin\",\n \"porn\",\n \"hentai\",\n \"incest\",\n \"suicide\",\n \"killyourself\",\n \"kys\",\n];\n\n// Words that are shaped like input but should never be echoed back.\nconst REJECT = new Set([\n \"http\",\n \"https\",\n \"www\",\n \"com\",\n \"net\",\n \"org\",\n \"nightbot\",\n \"timeout\",\n \"ban\",\n \"mod\",\n \"unban\",\n \"vip\",\n \"announce\",\n \"me\",\n \"color\",\n]);\n\n// Skipped when choosing which word to slot into a template, so \"my ex\" echoes\n// \"ex\". If a query is nothing but stopwords, it falls through to a wildcard.\nconst STOPWORDS = new Set([\n \"the\",\n \"a\",\n \"an\",\n \"my\",\n \"his\",\n \"her\",\n \"their\",\n \"our\",\n \"your\",\n \"its\",\n \"this\",\n \"that\",\n \"these\",\n \"those\",\n \"is\",\n \"are\",\n \"was\",\n \"were\",\n \"be\",\n \"been\",\n \"am\",\n \"of\",\n \"in\",\n \"on\",\n \"at\",\n \"to\",\n \"for\",\n \"with\",\n \"about\",\n \"and\",\n \"but\",\n \"or\",\n \"so\",\n \"if\",\n \"it\",\n \"he\",\n \"she\",\n \"they\",\n \"we\",\n \"you\",\n \"i\",\n \"me\",\n \"him\",\n \"them\",\n \"us\",\n \"again\",\n \"always\",\n \"just\",\n \"very\",\n \"really\",\n \"so\",\n \"too\",\n \"not\",\n \"no\",\n \"why\",\n \"how\",\n \"what\",\n \"when\",\n \"all\",\n \"some\",\n \"any\",\n \"more\",\n \"most\",\n \"own\",\n // Function words that read as descriptions if slotted in: \"out of gold\"\n // would otherwise produce \"the gold could be out or it could be absent\".\n \"out\",\n \"off\",\n \"up\",\n \"down\",\n \"still\",\n \"never\",\n \"ever\",\n \"back\",\n \"here\",\n \"there\",\n]);\n\nconst FALLBACK =\n \"F1re's complaint department is temporarily overwhelmed. Try again.\";\n\n// ============================================================================\n// LOGIC — you should not need to touch anything below here.\n// ============================================================================\n\n// alias -> topic id, built once at module load.\nexport const ALIAS = new Map();\nfor (const [id, t] of Object.entries(TOPICS)) {\n // COMBOS and MODIFIERS both need a label, so a topic added without one must\n // fail loudly here rather than print \"the undefined\" into chat.\n if (!t.noun) throw new Error(`topic \"${id}\" is missing a noun label`);\n for (const a of t.aliases) {\n if (ALIAS.has(a)) {\n throw new Error(`duplicate alias \"${a}\" (${ALIAS.get(a)} vs ${id})`);\n }\n ALIAS.set(a, id);\n }\n}\n\n// Placeholders owned by the pools, not by SLOTS. Declared here because the\n// validation below runs at module load, before the substitution helpers.\nconst RESERVED = new Set([\"w\", \"a\", \"b\", \"adj\", \"noun\", \"by\"]);\nconst PLACEHOLDER = /\\{([a-z]+[0-9]*)\\}/g;\n\n// A placeholder that names no known slot would be printed literally into chat,\n// so a typo like {eoc} fails at load rather than on stream.\nfor (\n const [pool, line] of [\n ...Object.entries(TOPICS).flatMap(([id, t]) => t.lines.map((l) => [id, l])),\n ...TEMPLATES.map((l) => [\"TEMPLATES\", l]),\n ...WILDCARDS.map((l) => [\"WILDCARDS\", l]),\n ...COMBOS.map((l) => [\"COMBOS\", l]),\n ...MODIFIERS.map((l) => [\"MODIFIERS\", l]),\n ]\n) {\n for (const [, name] of line.matchAll(/\\{([a-z]+[0-9]*)\\}/g)) {\n if (RESERVED.has(name)) continue;\n if (!SLOTS[name.replace(/[0-9]+$/, \"\")]) {\n throw new Error(\n `unknown placeholder {${name}} in ${pool}: \"${line.slice(0, 60)}\"`,\n );\n }\n }\n}\n\n// Compile the tag spec once. Every stem is anchored to a word start, so a stem\n// can never match inside an unrelated word. Entries keep stems/words and gain\n// `re`, which heckle.js depends on.\nexport const TAGS = TAG_SPEC.map((spec) => {\n if (!TOPICS[spec.topic]) {\n throw new Error(`tag points at unknown topic \"${spec.topic}\"`);\n }\n const esc = (s) => s.replace(/[.*+?^${}()|[\\]\\\\]/g, \"\\\\$&\");\n const { words = [], stems = [] } = spec;\n const parts = [];\n if (stems.length) parts.push(`\\\\b(?:${stems.map(esc).join(\"|\")})`);\n if (words.length) parts.push(`\\\\b(?:${words.map(esc).join(\"|\")})\\\\b`);\n return { ...spec, re: new RegExp(parts.join(\"|\")) };\n});\n\nconst LEET = {\n \"4\": \"a\",\n \"@\": \"a\",\n \"3\": \"e\",\n \"1\": \"i\",\n \"!\": \"i\",\n \"0\": \"o\",\n \"5\": \"s\",\n \"$\": \"s\",\n \"7\": \"t\",\n \"+\": \"t\",\n \"8\": \"b\",\n};\n\nfunction leetFold(s) {\n let out = \"\";\n for (const ch of s) out += LEET[ch] || ch;\n return out.replace(/[^a-z]/g, \"\");\n}\n\n// Lowercase, drop anything that is not a letter/digit/space/hyphen, cap at 6 words.\nfunction tokenize(raw) {\n return String(raw || \"\")\n .toLowerCase()\n .replace(/[^a-z0-9\\s-]/g, \" \")\n .split(/\\s+/)\n .filter(Boolean)\n .slice(0, 6);\n}\n\n// A typo budget that scales with word length. Short words get 0 so that\n// \"map\" does not fuzzy-match \"lap\", \"cap\", \"mad\".\nfunction maxDistFor(w) {\n if (w.length <= 3) return 0;\n if (w.length <= 5) return 1;\n if (w.length <= 9) return 2;\n return 3;\n}\n\nfunction commonPrefix(a, b) {\n let i = 0;\n while (i < a.length && i < b.length && a[i] === b[i]) i++;\n return i;\n}\n\n// Levenshtein with early exit once every cell in a row exceeds max.\nfunction lev(a, b, max) {\n const al = a.length, bl = b.length;\n if (Math.abs(al - bl) > max) return max + 1;\n let prev = new Array(bl + 1);\n for (let j = 0; j <= bl; j++) prev[j] = j;\n for (let i = 1; i <= al; i++) {\n const cur = new Array(bl + 1);\n cur[0] = i;\n let best = cur[0];\n for (let j = 1; j <= bl; j++) {\n const sub = prev[j - 1] + (a[i - 1] === b[j - 1] ? 0 : 1);\n cur[j] = Math.min(prev[j] + 1, cur[j - 1] + 1, sub);\n if (cur[j] < best) best = cur[j];\n }\n if (best > max) return max + 1;\n prev = cur;\n }\n return prev[bl];\n}\n\n// The ladder. Returns { topic, rung } — topic is null when nothing matched.\nexport function resolveTopic(raw) {\n const words = tokenize(raw);\n if (words.length === 0) {\n return { topic: null, rung: \"empty\", topics: [], modifier: null };\n }\n\n // Rungs 2 + 3: scan every token for an exact alias, collecting each distinct\n // topic in the order the viewer typed it.\n const hits = [];\n let firstAt = -1;\n for (let i = 0; i < words.length; i++) {\n const t = ALIAS.get(words[i]);\n if (!t) continue;\n if (firstAt < 0) firstAt = i;\n if (!hits.includes(t)) hits.push(t);\n }\n\n // Rung 2.5: two topics in one query get a line that names both.\n if (hits.length >= 2) {\n return {\n topic: hits[0],\n rung: \"combo\",\n topics: hits.slice(0, 2),\n modifier: null,\n };\n }\n\n if (hits.length === 1) {\n // Rung 3.5: the describing word is the non-stopword immediately before the\n // alias, skipping stopwords (\"that weird wall\" -> \"weird\"). Precision over\n // recall: a modifier grabbed from elsewhere in the sentence reads worse\n // than none, so \"that boar honestly\" deliberately finds nothing.\n let modifier = null;\n for (let i = firstAt - 1; i >= 0; i--) {\n if (STOPWORDS.has(words[i])) continue;\n if (!ALIAS.has(words[i])) modifier = words[i];\n break;\n }\n return {\n topic: hits[0],\n rung: modifier ? \"modifier\" : \"alias\",\n topics: hits,\n modifier,\n };\n }\n\n // Rung 4: typo tolerance, ranked by (edit distance, then common prefix).\n // The prefix tiebreak matters: \"pahting\" is distance 2 from both \"pathing\"\n // and \"rating\", and typos rarely corrupt the first letters of a word.\n // A tie on BOTH scores across two topics stays ambiguous and is dropped,\n // so a genuinely 50/50 typo falls through to tags rather than guessing.\n let best = null, bestD = Infinity, bestP = -1, ambiguous = false;\n for (const w of words) {\n const max = maxDistFor(w);\n if (max === 0) continue;\n for (const [alias, topic] of ALIAS) {\n const d = lev(w, alias, max);\n if (d > max) continue;\n const p = commonPrefix(w, alias);\n // A typo almost never corrupts the first letter, so a candidate sharing\n // no prefix at all is a real word that happens to sit near an alias, not\n // a misspelling of it: falling/walling, remote/emote, unstable/stable.\n if (p === 0) continue;\n if (d < bestD || (d === bestD && p > bestP)) {\n bestD = d;\n bestP = p;\n best = topic;\n ambiguous = false;\n } else if (d === bestD && p === bestP && best !== topic) {\n ambiguous = true;\n }\n }\n }\n if (best && !ambiguous) {\n return { topic: best, rung: \"fuzzy\", topics: [best], modifier: null };\n }\n\n // Rung 5: keyword families against the whole normalized string.\n const joined = words.join(\" \");\n for (const { re, topic } of TAGS) {\n if (re.test(joined)) {\n return { topic, rung: \"tag\", topics: [topic], modifier: null };\n }\n }\n\n // Rung 5.5: a bare judgement word. Every TEMPLATE reads {w} as a noun, so\n // \"!complaint dumb\" produced \"a developer is being paid to maintain dumb\".\n // Route it to MODIFIERS, where the word is treated as a description instead.\n // If the query also carries an unmatched noun (\"dumb refrigerator\"), use that\n // as the thing being described; otherwise a generic one is picked later.\n const adjAt = words.findIndex((w) => ADJECTIVES.has(w));\n if (adjAt >= 0) {\n const other = words.find(\n (w, i) => i !== adjAt && !STOPWORDS.has(w) && !ADJECTIVES.has(w),\n );\n return {\n topic: null,\n rung: \"bareadj\",\n topics: [],\n modifier: words[adjAt],\n nounWord: other || null,\n };\n }\n\n return { topic: null, rung: \"unknown\", topics: [], modifier: null };\n}\n\n// Rung 6/7 gate. Returns the word to echo, or null to fall to a wildcard.\nexport function sanitizeWord(raw) {\n const words = tokenize(raw);\n if (words.length === 0) return null;\n\n // A slur anywhere in the query rejects the whole thing, not just that token.\n // Otherwise \"the walls\" would still earn a reply.\n for (const w of words) {\n const folded = leetFold(w);\n for (const stem of BLOCK) if (folded.includes(stem)) return null;\n }\n\n // Echo the first word carrying actual meaning: \"my ex\" should slot in \"ex\",\n // not \"my\", or the template reads \"There is no my issue\".\n for (const w of words) {\n if (STOPWORDS.has(w)) continue;\n if (w.length < 2 || w.length > 18) continue;\n if (!/^[a-z0-9-]+$/.test(w)) continue;\n if (/(.)\\1{3,}/.test(w)) continue; // aaaaa\n if (/^[0-9-]+$/.test(w)) continue; // pure digits\n if (REJECT.has(w)) return null; // url/command shaped: reject outright\n return w;\n }\n return null;\n}\n\n// Shuffle bag: deal every line in a pool before any line repeats.\nconst bags = new Map();\nfunction draw(key, pool) {\n if (!pool || pool.length === 0) return null;\n let bag = bags.get(key);\n if (!bag || bag.length === 0) {\n bag = pool.map((_, i) => i);\n for (let i = bag.length - 1; i > 0; i--) {\n const j = Math.floor(Math.random() * (i + 1));\n [bag[i], bag[j]] = [bag[j], bag[i]];\n }\n bags.set(key, bag);\n }\n return pool[bag.pop()];\n}\n\nfunction personalize(line, by) {\n if (!line.includes(\"{by}\")) return line;\n const name = /^[a-zA-Z0-9_]{1,25}$/.test(by || \"\") ? by : \"chat\";\n return line.split(\"{by}\").join(name);\n}\n\nfunction clip(s, max) {\n if (s.length <= max) return s;\n const cut = s.slice(0, max);\n const sp = cut.lastIndexOf(\" \");\n return (sp > max * 0.6 ? cut.slice(0, sp) : cut).trimEnd();\n}\n\nfunction fill(line, subs) {\n let out = line;\n for (const [key, value] of Object.entries(subs)) {\n out = out.split(`{${key}}`).join(value);\n }\n return out;\n}\n\n// Resolve {slot} vocabularies. The same name repeated in one line resolves to\n// the same value (\"F1re's gold ... his opponent's gold\"); a numbered variant\n// ({eco2}) draws a different value from the same list.\nfunction fillSlots(line) {\n if (!line.includes(\"{\")) return line;\n const chosen = new Map();\n const usedPerSlot = new Map();\n return line.replace(PLACEHOLDER, (whole, name) => {\n if (RESERVED.has(name)) return whole;\n if (chosen.has(name)) return chosen.get(name);\n const slot = name.replace(/[0-9]+$/, \"\");\n const pool = SLOTS[slot];\n if (!pool) return whole; // validated at load; never reached in practice\n const used = usedPerSlot.get(slot) || new Set();\n const free = pool.filter((v) => !used.has(v));\n const from = free.length ? free : pool;\n const pick = from[Math.floor(Math.random() * from.length)];\n used.add(pick);\n usedPerSlot.set(slot, used);\n chosen.set(name, pick);\n return pick;\n });\n}\n\n// The last step for every reply, whichever pool it came from.\nfunction finish(raw, by) {\n const line = raw || FALLBACK;\n let out = personalize(fillSlots(line), by);\n // Several lines open on a substituted word (\"{adj} is what it looks like\",\n // \"{eco} ran out\"), and viewer input arrives lowercased, so without this the\n // reply starts mid-sentence. Skipped when the line opens on {by}: a Twitch\n // display name keeps whatever casing its owner chose.\n if (!/^\\{by\\}/.test(line)) out = out.charAt(0).toUpperCase() + out.slice(1);\n return clip(out, 380);\n}\n\nexport function buildReply(query, by) {\n const raw = String(query || \"\").slice(0, 120);\n const { topic, rung, topics, modifier, nounWord } = resolveTopic(raw);\n\n // The modifier is viewer-supplied text that gets spoken on stream, so it runs\n // through the same sanitizer as the template word. Rejected -> plain line.\n const adj = rung === \"modifier\" || rung === \"bareadj\"\n ? sanitizeWord(modifier)\n : null;\n\n let line;\n if (rung === \"empty\") {\n line = draw(\"__wild\", WILDCARDS);\n } else if (rung === \"combo\") {\n line = fill(draw(\"__combo\", COMBOS), {\n a: TOPICS[topics[0]].noun,\n b: TOPICS[topics[1]].noun,\n });\n } else if (adj) {\n // With a topic, describe the topic. Without one, describe whatever noun the\n // viewer supplied, else something generic.\n const noun = topic\n ? TOPICS[topic].noun\n : (nounWord && sanitizeWord(nounWord)) || draw(\"__thing\", SLOTS.thing);\n line = fill(draw(\"__mod\", MODIFIERS), { adj, noun });\n } else if (topic) {\n line = draw(topic, TOPICS[topic].lines);\n } else {\n const w = sanitizeWord(raw);\n line = w\n ? fill(draw(\"__tpl\", TEMPLATES), { w })\n : draw(\"__wild\", WILDCARDS);\n }\n\n return finish(line, by);\n}\n\n// Always 200 with a joke body: Nightbot prints raw fetch errors into chat.\nexport default async function (req) {\n let body;\n try {\n const url = new URL(req.url);\n const q = url.searchParams.get(\"q\") || \"\";\n body = buildReply(q, url.searchParams.get(\"by\"));\n\n // Shows up in the val's Logs tab. Read it after a week to see which topics\n // chat actually types, then deepen those pools rather than guessing.\n // rung \"unknown\" means it fell through to a template — a run of those on\n // the same word is a topic worth adding.\n //\n // Deliberately logs the query but NOT the asker: knowing what gets typed\n // is the point; knowing who typed it is not. resolveTopic runs a second\n // time here to keep buildReply pure and silent under test.\n const { topic, rung } = resolveTopic(q);\n console.log(JSON.stringify({ q: q.slice(0, 120), topic, rung }));\n } catch {\n body = FALLBACK;\n }\n return new Response(body || FALLBACK, {\n status: 200,\n headers: {\n \"content-type\": \"text/plain; charset=utf-8\",\n \"cache-control\": \"no-store\",\n },\n });\n}","f1re",[146],"pulls","branches","forks","envVars",{"_161":163,"_164":63},"connections",{"_161":63,"_162":63},"count","unfilledCount",6,"emptyCount",{"_43":145,"_32":146,"_30":57,"_131":-5,"_41":42,"_40":147,"_132":25,"_38":175,"_13":149,"_34":150,"_36":151,"_24":25,"_135":152,"_169":176,"_27":177},{"_43":137,"_32":138,"_30":139,"_131":-5,"_41":42,"_40":140,"_132":59,"_38":172,"_13":142,"_34":35,"_36":143,"_24":25,"_135":-5,"_169":173,"_27":174},{"_43":130,"_32":28,"_30":31,"_131":-5,"_41":42,"_40":14,"_132":25,"_38":168,"_13":134,"_34":35,"_36":37,"_24":25,"_135":-5,"_169":170,"_27":171},["D",1788536356309],"children",[],[28],["D",1788536346749],[],[138],["D",1788357150480],[],[146],["D",1788257244975],{"_97":96,"_105":101},{"_97":96,"_98":99,"_100":101,"_18":55,"_102":103,"_104":25},{"_13":86,"_32":87,"_43":42,"_88":44,"_89":-5,"_90":-5,"_91":-5,"_92":-5,"_93":-5,"_94":45,"_95":96},"ctx",{"_79":-5,"_124":215,"_216":217,"_218":219,"_220":25,"_221":25,"_222":25,"_223":59,"_224":-5,"_225":-7,"_226":-7,"_227":63,"_228":25,"_229":25,"_230":-5,"_231":25,"_232":25,"_233":25,"_234":-5},"ENV",{"_186":187,"_188":189,"_190":87,"_191":192,"_193":194,"_195":196,"_197":198,"_199":200,"_201":202,"_203":204,"_205":206,"_207":208,"_209":210,"_211":212,"_213":214},"REACT_APP_SENTRY_DSN","https://586020d86f05489db63a554690acf1e9@o1398359.ingest.sentry.io/6724499","RENDER_GIT_COMMIT","e87eb04e707cf64e7e532c8e8ec395f209e17f15","RENDER_GIT_BRANCH","POSTHOG_API_TOKEN","phc_nmoyuAkStEZuUp69rYlg1DZgrIt19Gx0Y4Hwf8tGgJP","POSTHOG_API_HOST","https://wart.val.town","WEB_API_TEMPLATE","https://{val}.web.val.run","APP_URL","https://www.val.town","MODULE_URL","https://esm.town","VANITY_WEB_API_TEMPLATE","https://{label}.val.run/","DENOLS_URL","https://lsp.val.town","NODE_ENV","production","CLOUDFLARE_TURNSTILE_SITE_KEY","0x4AAAAAACtaIZJH7s9rBMZ6","GOOGLE_CLIENT_ID","875989696899-jtsqkhlbdv5jrlsk8631p7ipjg3c6o62.apps.googleusercontent.com","STRIPE_PUBLISHABLE_KEY","pk_live_51N2zvWEpZTTLipIkVEwXrUG9AT0yeOOEYxszarZT1jpsZV58Ly6wlg3SltZpHN26CUalOBmUSY7adQRQiSkCZz2500qSXNkf8Y","API_URL","https://api.val.town",[],"preferencesKeybindings","default","preferencesTheme","light","preferencesFixers","preferencesCopilot","preferencesSelectionAi","preferencesCloseBrackets","preferencesChatPanelState","preferencesDprint","preferencesDenofmt","notificationCount","flagDenols","isBusinessOrgMember","businessOrgHandle","isBusinessOrgAdmin","isHigherTownieTier","navCollapsed","currentOrgId"]

Diff · v23